How to know if your friend is gay
by Fred Penzel, PhD
This article was initially published in the Winter 2007 edition of the OCD Newsletter.
OCD, as we know, is largely about experiencing harsh and unrelenting doubt. It can cause you to doubt even the most basic things about yourself – even your sexual orientation. A 1998 examine published in the Journal of Sex Research set up that among a team of 171 college students, 84% reported the occurrence of sexual intrusive thoughts (Byers, et al. 1998). In order to contain doubts about one’s sexual identity, a sufferer call for not ever have had a homo- or heterosexual experience, or any type of sexual experience at all. I have observed this symptom in immature children, adolescents, and adults as well. Interestingly Swedo, et al., 1989, found that approximately 4% of children with OCD experience obsessions concerned with forbidden offensive or perverse sexual thoughts.
Although doubts about one’s have sexual identity might appear pretty straightforward as a symptom, there are actually a number of variations. The most obvious develop is where a sufferer experiences the thought that they might be of a different sexual orientation than they formerly believed. If the su
If Someone Comes Out to You
Someone who is coming out feels close enough to you and trusts you sufficiently to be truthful and risk losing you as a friend. It can be difficult to know what to say and what to do to be a supportive friend to someone who has “come out” to you. Below are some suggestions you may wish to follow.
- Thank your companion for having the courage to reveal you. Choosing to tell you means that they acquire a great deal of respect and trust for you.
- Don’t evaluate your friend. If you have mighty religious or other beliefs about LGBTIQ communitites, keep them to yourself for now. There will be plenty of time in the future for you to think and talk about your beliefs in bright of your friend’s identity.
- Respect your friend’s confidentiality. Allow them the integrity to distribute what they crave , when and how they want to.
- Tell your friend that you still care about them, no matter what. Be the friend you contain always been. The main fear for people coming out is that their friends and family will reject them.
- Don’t be too serious. Sensitively worded humor may ease the tension you are both probably feeling.
- Ask questions you may have, but understand that your friend
How Do I Assist My Gay Friend?
by D’Ann Davis
“How complete I help my gay friend?” This is a ask we hear constantly in the Living Hope office, when out speaking at events, or from friends and church members from around the world. Twenty years ago scant Christians asked this question, for not many knew any identical gender attracted people, or if they did know them, they were illiterate to their friend’s struggles. Today almost everyone knows of someone who identifies as gay or deals with a measure of alike gender attractions. Even if a Christian finds himself in a season of life where he does not personally know of a same gender attracted (SGA) person in his sphere of influence, this ask is of utmost importance in clear of the transform of our tradition and the growing willingness of Christians dealing with SGA to openly communicate about their issues. So how does one help a gay-identified friend or SGA friend?
The first response I typically give to this question is actually another question. “Does your friend grasp Jesus?” This is a vital first question any believer must tackle before attempting to support a friend deal with her sexual attractions. This is because there are two different ro
Understanding the Situation
Sexual orientation is a personal matter, and unless your friend explicitly tells you, you can never be 100% sure. However, if you’re wondering whether your friend might be homosexual, either because you suspect they’re struggling with their identity or you think they might hold feelings for you, it’s crucial to approach the topic with sensitivity and respect.
Here are some common signs that might demonstrate your friend is gay and how to navigate the situation without making assumptions or making them uncomfortable.
1. They Avoid Talking About Their Love Life
If your friend dodges conversations about crushes or relationships but is cozy talking about every other aspect of their life, it might be because they’re not ready to discuss their sexual orientation.
Examples:
- They change the subject when someone asks about their dating life.
- They rarely mention any romantic interests.
- They seem uncomfortable when discussing relationships with the opposite gender.
This doesn’t necessarily mean they’re gay, some people are just private, but if combined with other signs, it might be a clue.
2. They Show a Strong Interest in LGBTQ+ Topics